


Dreams You’d Like To Sell

by GreenOnyx



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst, Canonical Character Death, Emotions, F/M, Flashbacks, Mostly Leia/Poe but significant amounts of Han/Leia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-01
Updated: 2018-10-26
Packaged: 2019-07-20 23:56:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,016
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16148246
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GreenOnyx/pseuds/GreenOnyx
Summary: After the attack on Maz’s Castle, before the battle of Starkiller Base, Leia’s love life gets slightly more complicated.





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the attack on Maz’s Castle, before the battle of Starkiller Base, Leia’s love life gets slightly more complicated.

Poe held onto Leia so tightly, thrusted into her so urgently, and she held onto him just as tightly. Arms and legs wrapped around each other, two people making wordless noises, isolated syllables of passionate gratitude that Poe hadn’t been killed on Jakku. 

That was in the early morning. Now, unbelievably, it was still the same day, and she was looking at her husband for the first time in years and trying to make sure that whatever she was having in lieu of a love life didn’t cause some kind of explosive incident. 

“Seeing someone?” Han looked like he couldn’t believe what he was hearing  
“Don’t say it like that”  
“Well how should I say it, then? We’re still married, Leia-“  
“Oh and you’ve been celibate for the last six years have you?”  
“Well I never kicked you out of bed for anyone”  
“I’m not” she spoke slowly “kicking you out. For starters you weren’t here in the first place” she held up her hand to signify surrender when Han opened his mouth to complain again “and I’m not saying you can’t stay in here, I’m not saying anything. I just thought you should know.”

She’d been so glad to see him, so glad to touch him, hold him again. She didn’t know what she was doing with Poe, but she knew she didn’t want to hide it from Han. They’d been so far apart for so long, even if she’d wanted to mention it before now, when would she have had the opportunity? She hadn’t even known where Han was for at least the last four years. Their force connection was the only reason she’d even known he was still alive. 

Han sighed and sat on the sofa in Leia’s private quarters. He ran a hand through his messy grey hair and finally asked “So who is it? Did Amilyn finally get her way?” His tone was light now that he knew he wasn’t being kicked out. Leia smiled at the thought of Amilyn. Han was always so sure Amilyn harbored deeper feelings for Leia than she let on. Leia was less sure. There had been too many opportunities Amilyn hadn’t taken with her, opportunities Leia sorely wanted her to take advantage of at the time... but all the same, they were just old friends. 

“A naval officer? And what good would that do me? A second missing lover, somewhere in the stars” Leia gestured dramatically toward the implied sky “the idea of physical contact” she finished with mock affect. 

“Alright” Han smiled “so it’s not Holdo” he held her gaze for a long moment. There was so much love in his eyes, no jealousy that she could see, but sadness. She understood that. She felt it too. Sadness that the two of them could never get their act together, never stay in the same place at the same time, never follow through on the plans they made to give it all up and run away together. Neither of them ever could. He raised his eyebrows, silently asking for the name of whoever it was holding Leia at night, being there for her, doing what he couldn’t. 

“Poe” 

“Poe?” Han looked like he was trying to match the name to a face, and then he did “The Dameron boy?” His tone got a little accusatory “how old is he? He was in diapers when we were fighting the Empire”

“I wasn’t a lot older than that myself. Before you get righteous on me, remember that I’m living proof that you never steered clear of a younger woman” 

“Oy” his voice was muffled behind his hands as he rubbed his face “you know what’s funny” he asked as he stood up to pace the room “somebody in a bar the other day told me ‘Poe Dameron is the new generation’s Han Solo’”  
Leia chuckled. Han didn’t. “So is this kid gonna get territorial? He gonna be upset if I stay in your room?”  
“Will it matter if he is?” Leia stood and put her hands on Han’s hips, looking up at him in a way that made it clear what his answer should be.  
“Will it matter to you?”  
“I don’t think he’ll be upset. The way he’s been looking at that stormtrooper, he’d have some nerve being upset with me.”  
“He could do worse than the stormtrooper” Han smiled as he pulled Leia in and kissed her head.


	2. Chapter 2

Poe reclined on one of the hills that served as the base’s terrestrial roof. He had no idea how he felt. As he took a drag off one of Kare’s hand rolled spliffs he thought he was sure he must be feeling something. There were too many highly emotional things vying for his attention, he just couldn’t focus on any of them. The battle at Maz’s had been exhilarating, a win on most fronts. He should’ve been very happy about that. He was sure he probably was. He knew for a fact he was happy to have found Finn again. Both of those things were tempered by the loss of the girl to the First Order, Rey, Finn’s friend, the one he couldn’t stop talking about. 

Then there was the General. And Han Solo. That was complex. Poe and Leia had, over time, fallen into something of a routine. She sent him on a mission, he nearly died but didn’t, he’d return to base, they’d fuck through the night. Only it wasn’t just some fucking. It never had been. They’d both tried to pretend that was all it was for the first few weeks, but... there was more there. They’d both acknowledged the ‘more’, but agreed it was better left unnamed. 

Poe knew though. He knew what it was he wasn’t calling by it’s name. Not out loud anyway. He was head over heels in love with Leia. He quite literally and very probably would die for her. Well... for the cause... but in so many ways the two felt the same. And Han Solo, The idol of Poe’s adolescence. The most impressive pilot in the galaxy. He should’ve been excited to meet him. But seeing Han and Leia walking together and looking deep into each other’s eyes, talking about their life and their family... Poe became accutely aware of what he was to Leia. He took another long drag and let it out slowly followed by a low and heartfelt “...fuck” and he let the weight of the realization that he was just the General’s side piece sink in. He really should’ve known it the whole time. He was kidding himself thinking she’d felt the same way he did. Poe wasn’t exactly a young man anymore. Until today he thought he’d carved out his place in the world, truly begun his life. He started today feeling like a man who had both a purpose and a woman to love. He was ending the day feeling like a lovesick kid who’d gotten ideas above his station and was getting kicked down a few pegs. 

His mind kept wandering to what his body felt like it should be doing right now. If tonight were a normal night he’d be sneaking to Leia’s quarters, maybe making love, maybe not. Maybe just sleeping. With her. Next to her. Under her. He cringed with embarrassment, remembering how sappy he’d been this morning. He’d woken up with her hand on his chest, next to his mother’s ring. While she was still asleep he’d actually picked up the ring and held it next to her finger to see if it might fit. He felt so stupid. He smoked the spliff down to ashes and wished he’d had the foresight to bargain with Kare for two. “Fuck it” he finally groaned as he pulled himself up and headed for his bunk.


	3. Flashback

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When it all started.  
> 1 year ago.  
> D’Qar.

Most of Black squadron were in the rec room playing a drinking game Jess had learned from her first bunk mate at the Naval Academy. Poe was a little fuzzy on the rules, it involved several dice and if you rolled certain numbers you had to take certain kinds of dares. The last bloackade run had yielded more mostly fresh fruit than usual. Some of the stuff that was about to be too ripe to eat had promptly been commandeered by a few bold pilots and was now swimming in a large soup pot with jet juice and some chilled Gatalentan pink tea. It actually wasn’t a half bad concoction in the end. 

Poe had poured several mugs of the dangerous punch and was carrying a tray of them around the base, discreetly distributing them to people he didn’t find annoying and mouthing the words “rec room” to the recipients to slowly build up the party. He had four mugs left and was heading toward the command room when he ran into Connix and Oddy. He stopped them and handed them each a mug, handling them delicately, like the precious commodity they were. He whispered “rec room” and held his index finger up in the ‘shh’ position. Oddy nodded, Connix winked, and they headed off smiling. He felt like everyone’s fairy godmother, bestowing priceless treasures to the children of the resistance. He hadn’t really expected to find anyone in the command room at this time of night when they’d had no action in days, but he checked anyway. He poked his head around the corner and saw the General. 

She was standing at the central console, wearing one of the long dresses she was so rarely seen in these days and looking every bit the princess.  
“What is it, Poe?” She called without looking up from her data pad.  
“It’s fine if you’re busy. It’s not important.”  
As much as he really wanted the General to join them, he didn’t believe she would. He also didn’t believe she wouldn’t be at least a little angry at all of them for misuse of the resistance’s limited supplies.  
“Poe. It’s better if you just say it.”  
She looked up at him impatiently. He accepted that he was caught and brought the rest of his body into the command room.  
“I thought maybe you could use a drink. The punch is already made” he said in a way that implied he wasn’t at all responsible for it (even though he’d contributed the last of his teabags to the cause) “the party’s already happening. There’s no getting that fruit back now”  
Leia’s eyebrows raised dangerously “not all of it” Poe hurried to amend “by the looks of it, just the stuff that wasn’t long for this world anyway”.  
She looked placated by that and eyed the mug he was offering her. She took it, smelled it, seemed to decide it wasn’t too toxic, and took a sip. She took another drink, bigger this time. She closed her eyes and savored it. Poe took the opportunity to stare openly. She was so beautiful. He knew that. He was aware of it on a daily basis, but he so rarely got to just look at her. Eyes still closed, she breathed out slowly and said quietly, appreciatively  
“Damn”  
She looked into her mug and swirled the pink beverage around and fished out a berry to pop in her mouth. Poe’s stomach flipped like he was doing barrrel rolls. A minute ago he’d felt like this booze was the ultimate luxury, now he knew better. This was it. She was it. One on one time with Leia Organa. Watching Leia Organa savor an indulgence was his new favorite thing to do. He quickly made a list in his head, an unfortunately short list, of every possible thing he could give her to be allowed to relive this moment. He mentally scratched out the last item on the list. Orgasm was probably not one of the things he was going to be allowed to gift the General. She looked at him with a depth and sincerity she never had before and said “Thank you, Poe” and before he had a chance to reply she said “you should get back to the party. Your absence is always conspicuous.” And, mug in hand, she turned her attention back to her data pad. That was it. She changed his life and went back to work all in under a minute. He took the last mug for himself, tucked the tray under his arm, and headed back to the party. 

In all fairness, it was a good party. Everyone was pleasantly drunk, everyone was laughing, half the room was dancing, and Poe was bored. Every room Leia wasn’t in felt like a waste of space. Maybe not a waste of space, that wasn’t fair. He did love these people, he did want them to be happy and have fun. He just found that without Leia present he didn’t care. The world outside of the immediate vicinity of Leia Organa felt hollow and trite. He stared down at his empty mug and half listened to the drinking game that was still going on. Snap had had to reach into a bag full of strips of flimsy with random names on them. Kare was announcing the outcome of his roll of the dice and what his dare was “Alright lover, it looks like I’ll have to set my” She grabbed his face “ferocious jealousy aside while you seduce...” she sat on his lap with a flourish and read the slip of paper with great dramatic affect “General Organa!” Half the room squealed in delight while a few looked jealous and the rest looked worried. Mostly though everyone just kept laughing, but one person yelled “You are shitting me!” Kare stood up held the paper out with both hands, showing the room she was indeed not shitting them. Snap looked like someone had just handed him a live grenade.  
“I cannot do that”  
“You’ve got to do that” Kare egged him on. She was having the most fun Poe had ever seen her have.  
“I’ll be the first person fired from the resistance. Is that how you want me to go out? Kicked off the planet for sexual harassment?” His protests were drowned out by drunken cheers for him to follow through on his dare.  
“I’ll do it” Poe offered. Snap looked grateful but still worried.  
“No, man we need you. This is a stupid dare and no one has to do it” he tried in vain to reason with the room full of drunk people who were having too much fun. Poe didn’t actually intend to try anything, he was just drunk and wanted a reason to seek out Leia. Or to just be alone without seeming glum. Even though he sort of felt glum.  
“Nah I got you, buddy.” He winked at Snap and rushed out the door before anyone could stop him. He could hear Snap saying  
“That counts! I still get a point!”

 

Poe walked into the command room to find Leia still nursing her drink. He’d finished his slightly too fast and had the confidence of a person who had done so. She looked up at him with one raised, questioning eyebrow. Poe made up his mind at the last second.  
“Sorry, General. There was just something I didn’t do earlier and I know it’s gonna bug me forever if I don’t fix it.”  
She seemed satisfied and was going to look back at her datapad, expecting him to be finishing some official task that didn’t need her attention. That was, until he stood very close to her. It was like he was moving in slow motion, raising his hands to her face and lowering his face at the same time. She thought about backing away, thought about slapping him, thought about merely placing a hand on his chest to push him back. She raised her hand to his chest, intending to stop him. But her hand had decided it would rather grab his shirt and pull. He was a very good kisser. Very, very good. She was better. 

Later on, in Leia’s quarters, with Poe’s head between her legs she became aware that the jet juice may have had some effect on her judgement. It had probably had some effect on Poe’s as well. She started to wonder how much of an effect before she decided that the focus, enthusiasm, and deft skill he was displaying probably indicated significant presence of mind and she decided to enjoy it. 

The next day when snap found Poe working on his ship and asked him what happened, Poe laughed with convincing shame and ‘admitted’ that he’d just gone to sleep when he left the party.  
“I knew it” Snap said in the same way someone would usually say ‘dammit’. “when you didn’t come back we took bets on whether you’d go through with it or not” he added.  
Poe slid out from under his x wing “what kinda odds you give me?” He wanted to know his reputation in the resistance  
“Well I put 15 on you going through with it and succeeding”  
“Thank you, man. That means a lot”  
“I believe in you, buddy. Jess had 20 on you going through with it and getting a black eye”  
“That’s less encouraging”  
“Yeah, but Kadel wins the pool. She had thirty on you passing out on the way”  
“I was not that drunk” Poe defended his own honor. He could hold his liquor better than that.  
“Yeah she may have been projecting on that one. She fell asleep on the table, mid-game.”  
“Understandable. She is very small.”  
“Anyway. What’s important is we are all, miraculously, still employed.”  
“The perks of being essential.”


	4. Chapter 4

It had been weeks since Starkiller base. Weeks since Han. Leia stayed strong during the day. She had to. The work needed to be done and she needed something to do. The night was different. Poe had known to give her space. Either that or he felt unwelcome, she wasn’t sure which. For a little while he’d have been right to feel unwelcome. She couldn’t tolerate company right away. She could barely tolerate her own company. She even did her best to tune out the force. She’d started taking walks before bed to put some distance between herself and all of the people whose concern she had to try so hard to tune out. She found a hill just past the base’s perimeter that turned out to be an excellent place to watch the storms. It was D’Qar’s rainy season and the storms over the valley were spectacular. She usually went inside when they got close. It seemed irresponsible to risk catching a cold and putting herself out of commission for days at a time. 

Tonight it was different. She had come out earlier than usual. The sun was setting, the rain was gentler than it had been, and the roll of thunder was soothing her into a trance. For the first time in decades her mind was clearing...emptying. Her consciousness had just enough room for the storm and nothing else. The clouds churned slowly, lightning flashed in them. The stark, violent crack of electricity resonated with something inside her. It was reassuring. It was familiar in a way that felt almost kindred. The storm came ever closer to where she sat and she felt no inclination to move. 

The rain washed over her and it felt like the embrace of an old friend. The rain and the thunder drowned out all other sound and she finally felt free to cry. She wept into the storm. She yelled into it. She gave over to the storm everything she had. The rain picked up and began to fall in sheets, the thunder crashed and Leia raged and wept and began to feel free. And when the storm subsided and the clouds opened up to a clear black sky it took her pain with it. She felt lighter. She felt able. The relief was almost euphoric. 

Back in her quarters she stood under her shower and let it wash away the mud and grass she’d collected outside. She cleaned off, wrung out her hair and wrapped herself in a towel. She took her time brushing out her hair in the mirror, looking at her face, trying to see the girl she’d been when all of this started. Maybe she’d have been less eager to jump into the rebellion if she’d known what it would continue to demand of her even now. Probably not though. Unlike most people, Leia did get the chance to do it again. And she chose the fight again. She couldn’t help but smile at the thought. Of course she’d always choose the fight for the light. Even if her convictions didn’t drive her to it... the fight against the darkness felt like home. It was the only home she still had. Leia flicked off the light and went into her bedroom. Poe was sitting on the bed looking like someone who was trying not to look worried. He looked up and assessed her, then, seeming a touch embarrassed he said  
“I uh... I heard you’d been gone awhile... came back in looking like you’d been through hell...”  
Leia laughed. She hadn’t considered how she must have looked with her puffy red eyes and mud strewn clothes when she came back to the base.  
“I have. But that’s not news and it didn’t happen tonight. Were you gonna rescue me, Commander Dameron?”  
He dipped his head laughed too.  
“Pretty ridiculous right?” His voice was more sincere than she’d expected. She’d always sort of thought she was something of a novelty for him; The Princess, the older woman, the General, the leader of the resistance. On paper she was the ultimate conquest. But this sounded like genuine concern... and a touch of humility. She approached him and lifted his chin.  
“What’s gotten into you, Dameron?”

Focusing on him, she could feel how conflicted he was, how unsure and afraid he was. She softened her expression. He wasn’t unwelcome anymore and she wanted him to know that.  
“You.” He sounded pained to be making such an admission “you got to me. You got under my skin much faster than I was ready for.” 

That was unexpected. 

But she liked it.


	5. Flashback(s)

32 years ago  
Millennium Falcon

As pleasurable as their lovemaking had been, both Han and Leia knew they hadn’t quite gotten the hang of it yet. They had fun for sure, but there was still a certain amount of awkwardness to it. They both spent so much time trying impress each other both in and out of the bedroom. Leia knew she had to just let go, just let herself fall into the rhythm of what was happening... but she knew Han wouldn’t. So she couldn’t. Everything was a competition with him-well-not exactly. It was only a competition with certain people. 

Han was never not showing off. Most people either didn’t know or care enough to feel the need to show off in return. Leia could let go, give over to the sensations and surrender control-but she could not let Han have the satisfaction. She would not be the delicate damsel succumbing to his prowess. Even if she tried, the smugness he’d radiate would kill the mood. 

It seemed they’d found a good compromise with their current endeavor though. Leia sat on the table, Han standing between her legs, his hand up her skirt. She was leaning back, resting on her hands, and giving him instructions while he fingered her.  
“That’s good” she said, breathing deeply “circles” she added simply while he rubbed wide circles around her clit. He was encouraged by her enthusiasm and picked up the pace. That ruined it. “Easy there, hotshot” she grabbed his wrist.  
He cocked an eyebrow at her  
“I thought you liked the circles”  
“I do. Slowly. Not everything has to happen at light speed.”  
He looked offended “Light speed?” He articulated every syllable with indignation. She realized it sounded like a dig at his stamina rather than his overeagerness. She sighed in amused exasperation and just took his hand in hers and placed it where she wanted it. He made a small low noise somewhere between a moan and an “oh” When she placed her hand over his and began using it to pleasure herself. The best way to lead was by example after all. 

He pressed his body closer to hers and wrapped his other arm around her. Soon she dropped her head back in pleasure. He watched her face as he did his best to follow her lead, to take her instructions without her having to put them into words. She pressed two of his fingers inside herself, she pressed the heel of his hand up against her clit, she pressed her cunt forward into his hand. Soon he was fucking her just the way she wanted with no help at all. They clung tighter to each other as her pace picked up. Soon she was thrusting up off of the table onto his hand and he was feeling the strain in his elbow. He powered through it. Nothing had ever been more worth it. When she came she made a noise he’d never heard her make before. He loved it. He loved letting her teach him how to make her make that noise.  
\- - - -  
11 1/2 months ago  
D’Qar 

Poe was unlike anyone else she’d slept with. Granted, her list of lovers wasn’t so very long.  
There was a touch of irony about it. Every one of her lovers before him had been someone she was of approximately equal status to (if you didn’t consider things like being a royal, and Leia didn’t) but they had all approached her as if they’d had to prove their worthiness to be in bed with her. That was nice in its own way, but it got old fast. Only Han had ever been around long enough to outgrow it. 

Poe though, he really was her subordinate, he really had (or should have had) reason to feel some insecurity about their coupling, but if he did, none of it showed in his technique. As he slowly unzipped her coverall, placing hot, wet, open mouthed kisses on every inch of skin he exposed it was obvious that he was, in the simplest way, here for pleasure. He sucked at her skin because he wanted her in his mouth. That was it. Not that her pleasure was unimportant to him, not at all. If he ever did something she didn’t react well to, he didn’t do it twice. He just didn’t seem to overthink. He didn’t hold back. He wasn’t performing either. He was indulging. He was on his knees now, following the zipper to its end just above her crotch. Her fingers ran through his hair while his kisses made her stomach flutter. He reached the end of the zipper. He stood up and spun her around. He pulled the coverall off her shoulders and palmed her breasts while began kissing her neck and sucking lightly at the spot behind her ear. 

She grabbed at his clothes to pull him closer. He was hard in his pants, she could feel it pressed against her. He played with her nipples through the fabric of her brassiere, rolling them, teasing them, pinching them. Then he wrapped one arm around her shoulders and reached his other hand into her underwear. He held her tight while he dipped two fingers into her wetness and began to rub up and down the length of her slit. He nibbled at her earlobe while he rubbed in gradually tighter circles around her clit, occasionally dipping in and fucking her for few moments before resuming his circles. She was nearing the brink of orgasm, sailing right toward the edge when he stopped.  
“Dameron!” She nearly shouted at him “I’m not finished.”

He smirked “I know.” He yanked the coverall the rest of the way down her body and began removing his own clothes. He knew he was taking a risk, but he had an inkling it might be worth it. Leia looked completely exasperated. She looked like she could kill him if she didn’t want him so much. It was already worth it. He couldn’t help smiling. This was going really really well. They both undressed in record time and she shoved him backward onto her bed and climbed on top of him rather aggressively. Perfect. He grabbed her hips as she started to ride him, chasing the orgasm she’d been so close to. She was flushed, impatient, frustrated and taking it all out on him. Poe Dameron was truly living the dream. Her hair had started to come loose from her braid and her mouth fell open while she fucked him hard. She found her orgasm and it was twice as good for the waiting. She rode through it and collapsed breathlessly on Poe’s chest. 

He rolled them over and sat up between her legs. She lay back and pressed against him, encouraging him to proceed. He began to fuck her slowly. He ran his hands slowly up and down her legs and over every part of her body he wanted his hands on while he fucked her. He fucked her slow and deep, making no effort to hold back a moan here, a grunt there. Soon they built their rhythm back up and he was pressing forward, holding onto her shoulders for purchase while she held onto his arms. She came again and he followed soon after. This time it was his turn to collapse on top of her. He covered her chest in kisses and then pulled the blanket around both of them. They’d been fucking on top of it so it wrapped mostly around Leia and left Poe a little cold. He didn’t complain. She had snuggled up against him and almost immediately dozed off. A cold ass felt like a small price to pay to give the woman he was falling in love with a bit of much needed rest.


End file.
